Episode D6.007 Mentor & Develop Others

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Introduction
What Do I Need To Know Before I Start?
If you want to succeed as a mentor, first seek to understand yourself and others. 

• Douglas Lawson said, “We exist temporarily through what we take, but we live forever through what we give.”

Why Many People Don’t Mentor Others1. INSECURITY 

1. When people are made to feel secure and important and appreciated, it will no longer be necessary for them to whittle down others in order to seem bigger in comparison.  That’s what insecure people do. 
2. Truly successful people, on the other hand, raise others up. 
3. One executive wrote a memo to HR director, “Search the org for an alert, aggressive young man who could step into my shoes — and when you find him, fire him.”  
4. Raising up others is a successful person’s joy. 

 2. EGO

1. Some people’s egos are so hugh that they have to be either the bride at the wedding or the corpse at the funeral. 
2. Adolf Hitler was like that.  When he was interviewing for a chauffeur, he talked with 30 people.  Finally he hired the shortest man he could find, even though the man required special blocks under the driver’s seat so he could see over the steering wheel. 

 3. INABILITY TO DISCERN PEOPLE’S “SUCCESS SEEDS”

1. I believe every person has the seed of success inside. 
2. The good news is that once you are able to find it in yourself, you’re better able to do the same with others.  When you do, it benefits both of you because you ten the person you help will be able to fulfill the purposes for which each was born. 
3. The ability to find another’s seed of success takes commitment, diligence, and a genuine desire to focus on others.  
4. You have to look at the person’s gifts, temperament, passions, successes, joys, and opportunities.  And once you find that seed, you need to fertilize it with encouragement and water it with opportunity.  If you do, the person will blossom before your eyes. 

 4. WRONG CONCEPT OF SUCCESS

1. True success is knowing your purpose, growing to reach your maximum potential, and sowing seeds to benefit others. The average person doesn’t know that.  He or she is scrambling to arrive at a destination or acquire more possessions than the next door neighbors. 
2. Cullen Hightower remarked, “A true measure of your worth includes all the benefits others have gained from  your success.”

 5. LACK OF TRAINING

1. The final reason many people don’t raise up the people around them is that they don’t know how to do it.  Individual mentoring isn’t normally taught in school. 
2. In school they normally even train teachers to disseminate info in a group, not to come alongside a single person, pour into her life, and raise her to a higher level. 

What You Need To Know As You Start

• Raising people to a higher level and helping them be successful involves more than giving them information or skills. ​

Show Objectives

REMIND YOURSELF THAT: 
1. EVERYONE WANTS TO FEEL WORTHWHILE

1. Donald Laird said, “Always help people increase their own self-esteem.  Develop your skill in making other people feel important. 
2. A person who feels worthwhile is rip for success. 

2. EVERYONE NEEDS AND RESPONDS TO ENCOURAGEMENT

1. Charles Schwab said, “I have yet to find the man, however exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than under a spirit of criticism.”  
2. If you desire to raise another person up, then you need to become one of her staunchest supporters.  People can tell when you don’t believe in them. 

3. PEOPLE ARE NATURALLY MOTIVATED

1. I’ve found that people are naturally motivated.  If you doubt that, just watch toddlers soon after they learn to walk.  They’re into everything. 
2. To get people excited about growing to their potential, you need to demotivate them.  Once you help them overcome the old things that knocked them down, they often motivate themselves.  

4. PEOPLE BUY INTO THE PERSON BEFORE BUYING INTO THEIR LEADERSHIP

1. Many unsuccessful people who try to lead others have the mistaken belief that people will follow them because their cause is good. 
2. People will follow you only when they believe in you. 
3. The more you understand people, the greater your chance of success in mentoring. 

Key Issues
5 Common Obstacles Created By Mentors

1. Lack of clear directions
2. Bureaucracy
3. Isolation
4. Busywork
5. Poor or dishonest Communication

What You Need to Do
How Do I Adopt A Mentor’s Mind-Set?

• Mentoring is who you are as much as what you do. 
• You can help them develop a roadmap for success and go on the journey with you as long as you keep growing as a person and a leader. 

THINK LIKE A MENTOR
Steps you will need in order to become the kind of mentor you are capable of being:

1. MAKE PEOPLE DEVELOPMENT YOUR TOP PRIORITY

1. ​If you want to succeed in developing people, you have to make it a top priority.  It’s always easier to dismiss people than to develop them.  
2. If you want to make a difference in the lives of others, do the same.  Commit yourself to developing people. 

2. LIMIT WHO YOU TAKE ALONG

1. As you begin to develop people, think of it as being similar to a trip in a small private plane.  IF you try to take too many people along, you’ll never get off the ground.  Besides, your time is limited. 
2. Use the Pareto (80/20) Principle.  In the case of developing people, you should spend 80 percent of your time developing only the top 20 percent of the people around you. 

3. DEVELOP RELATIONSHIPS BEFORE STARTING OUT 

1. The best leaders understand the important role of relationships when it comes to success.  For example, Lee Iacocca asked Vince Lombardi, what it took to make a winning team. 
2. The difference between mediocrity and greatness is the feeling these guys have for each other. 
3. If the personal relationships aren’t there first, people won’t travel far together. 
4. As you prepare to develop other people, take time to get to know each other.  Ask them to share their story with you — their journey so far.  
5. Another advantage to building relationships with people before starting on the journey together is that you find out what kind of “traveling companions” you’re going to have. 

4. GIVE HELP UNCONDITIONALLY

1. When you start developing people, you should never go into it with the idea of getting something out of it.  That attitude will almost certainly backfire on you.  
2. Give for the sake of giving — just for the joy of seeing another person learn to fly. 

5. LET THEM FLY WITH YOU FOR A WHILE

1. I want to share a secret with you.  It guarantees success in mentoring.  Are you ready?  Here it is: Never work alone.  
2. I know that sounds too simple, but it is truly the secret to developing others. 
3. Whenever you do anything that you want to pass along to others, take someone with you. 
4. In our traditional Cognitive Classroom Learning Model: 
   • The leader stands and speaks, asking questions or lecturing.  The follower sits at his feet, listening.  His goal is to comprehend the instructor’s ideas. 
   • That model is not idea for mentoring. 
5. Another approach:  Old Hebrew Model: Is an Apprentorship
   • I Do It: 
   • I Do It — And You Watch
   • You Do It — And I Watch
   • You Do It
6. Anyone who spends most of her time working in an area of weakness for a prolonged period of time will get frustrated and burned-out.  But a person developed in an area of strength will be catapulted toward her potential.  

6. PUT FUEL IN THEIR TANK

1. People won’t get far without fuel — and that means resources for their continuing personal growth.  Any mentor can give that valuable gift to someone he is developing.  
2. I regularly share books, CDs, mp4 with the people I’m developing and equipping. 
3. There are few greater thrills than putting into others’ hands a resource that can help take them to the next level. 

7. STAY WITH THEM UNTIL THEY CAN SOLO SUCCESSFULLY

1. I’ve been told that every student pilot looks forward to the first solo flight with anticipation — and a certain amount of fear.  But a good flight instructor wouldn’t allow a student to take that solo flight until he is already, nor would he let a student avoid her solo once she is ready.  I guess you could say that’s the difference between a true mentor and a wannabe. 
2. As you develop people, remember that you are taking them on the journey toward success with you, not sending them.  Stay with them until they’re ready to fly.  And when you are ready, get them on their way.  

8. CLEAR THE FLIGHT PATH

1. Even after teaching people to fly, providing them with fuel, and gaining them permission to take the controls, some mentors don’t take the last step required to make their people successful. 
2. They don’t give them an unencumbered flight path.  You must be intentional about clearing the path. 

5 Common Obstacles Created By Mentors

• Lack of clear directions
• Bureaucracy
• Isolation
• Busywork
• Poor or dishonest Communication

Once you begin to develop others, check to see that you’re not leaving obstacles in their path.  Give them clear direction, positive support, and the freedom to fly.  What you do can make the difference between their failure and success.  And when they succeed, so do you. 


9. HELP THEM REPEAT THE PROCESS

1. After you’ve done everything you can to help your people, and they have taken off and are soaring, you may think you’re finished.  Buy you’re not.  There is still one more step you must take to complete the process.  You should help them learn to repeat the development process and mentor others.  You see, there is no success without a successor. 

10. LIFT OTHERS HIGHER

1. Take others with you and help them change their lives for the better.  Nothing in life is more fun — or has a greater return.  You’ll never regret the time you invest in people.

Shows
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Written by Cedrick LaFleur
“Talk Leadership with Cedrick”