Parenting Kids Is Like Parenting A Business - Wendy Dickinson

Show Notes written by Wendy Dickinson, Catalytic Conversation$.

Parenting Kids Is Like Parenting A Business….

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Introduction:  
Today we are going to focus on the 60% of entrepreneurs who are parents.  Some of you start your businesses while your children are young. Others wait until the kids are older.  

Regardless, all of you parentreprenuers, listen up - you aren’t crazy!  Thomas Hai, CEO of Diapers2Go believes that the two complement one another.  You are actually translating the skills of parenting to those of an entrepreneur.  Brilliant! 

And, I think he’s right.  We anthropomorphize business as often as we do our pets.

SHOW OBJECTIVES: THE WHY

1. According to a study by the Human Brain Mapping Journal, “Entrepreneurial love is strikingly similar to paternal love.”  How about that?  There are both good and bad aspects of this, Folks.
2. Both require leadership abilities:
   1. Failure & obstacles become learning opportunities when you lead the learning process.
   2. Kids and business executives learn best by doing.
   3. You have the ability to create a family culture AND a corporate culture.
3. You can make incremental changes that will bring meaningful results in both the family and the company.

KEY ISSUES: Problems You May Encounter:
There are as many challenges for a family as there are for a business.  Entrepreneurs become problem solvers, so this is another instance for the entrepreneur to translate her/his skills over into the family.

Problems range from:

• Risking time off for paternity and/or maternity leave.  One CEO, Matt Blumberg writes of his unwillingness to forgo a conference call when one of his kids was born.  Not until later did he realize that his decision set a precedent for his team - they felt like they couldn’t take the time off either.  
• Childcare costs - a lot.  This can be a burden.
• Entrepreneurs may underestimate the amount of time they want, and need, to spend in the business.  This can create conflict and resentment in the partnership at home and at the office.
• Starting a business is a risk.  Growing the business is a risk.  Discomfort with risk can cause conflict, anxiety and poor decision making.
• BIMBO - business is my baby owner?  This type of owner runs the risk of creating a business that is unable to exist apart from the founder.  If your intention is to create a viable business, this is a problem.
• This leads to the all too common issue in entrepreneurs and parents - your identity is not the sum of the worth of your business and/or the accomplishments of your children.  Get a life.

What You Need To Know - THE WHAT:
You have the opportunity to shape the lives of your children, and the life of your company.  Culture, Vision, Values, Mission, Purpose, Intentions are critical elements of a successful business, and a successful family.

Get with your partner and define each.  Work together to create a full picture that contains the Vision, Values, Mission, Purpose, Culture and intentions for your business and for your family.

Status, certainty, autonomy, relatedness and fairness are the 5 drivers of behavior.  (I recommend David Rock’s Brain At Work book.)  Be fair.  Make sure everyone in the business and in the family understands expectations, goals, and what the mission and vision are.  

Families in the US pay over $11,400 per year for infants in childcare costs.  Toddlers cost about $10K, 4 year old's cost about $9K.  The average family pays $1480 per month in childcare expenses.  Over ⅓ of families feel like this is a financial burden.
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Both family life and your company benefit from the exercises of scenario planning - stranger danger, fire drills, code word for weirdness on play dates can be as beneficial as planning with your management team for pandemics, economic turmoil, death/injury, war, and a climate event.

What You Need To Do - THE HOW

1. Be intentional about the kind of parent you want to be.
2. Create a vision, mission, purpose, and prioritize values.  Do this on your own and then with your partner.  This is your personal compass. Use it every day.  Teach your children to use it, too.
3. Do the same for your business.  This is the compass for your business.  Use it everyday and teach others in the organization to use it, too.
4. Base responses to family events, incidents, happenings on that personal compass.  Look at each as a learning event not a reflection on your worth as a person, or parent, but as the guide of a young life who is traveling the road to independent thinking.
5. Empower your leadership team using that same approach.  This is value building in your business.  
6. Communicate clearly, kindly, lovingly - often.  Feedback for children that is both positive and constructive delivers a higher ROI than criticism.
7. Make time to build relationships with both your children, partner and employees.
8. Create clear rules, expectations, goals with consequences that emphasize that personal compass.

Resources:

1. Work The Bugs Out: Practices To Work In, & On, Your Business, by Wendy Dickinson, Publish: TBD.  Excerpt: Free Downloadable PDFs to work through.
2. “How To Run a Company and Spend Time with Your Kids”, Guy Sheetrit, business.com, August 13, 2019.
3. “Have Kids, Want To Start A Business?”, by Dorcas Cheng-Tozun, Inc.com, June 13, 2017.
4. “How I Manage 5 Kids and a Growing Business”, by Mark Daoust, Entrepreneur.com, Oct. 3, 2015.
5. “5 Parenting Skills That Make You Better At Running a Business”, by Gwen Moran, Entrepreneur.com, May 10, 2013.
6. “Affordable Childcare Is Increasingly Difficult to Find In The US”, by Megan Leonhardt, CNBC, May 15, 2020.
7. “10 Reasons Why More Parents Should Become Entreprenuers”, by Thomas Mai, Entrepreneur.com, August 24, 2018.

You can connect with Wendy Dickinson on FB, LinkedIn, and Instagram.

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